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Adventures in a Semi-Crunchy sitcom

April 20, 2012

This post is full of WAY TO MUCH INFORMATION.  It talks about poop and menstruation.  Not for the faint of heart people.

We aren’t quite all the way crunchy in our house.  I mean, I’ll be using some “greased lightening” to clean my stove top later today.

But we eat a far healthier diet than most Americans do.  My kids like veggies a lot.  We drink raw milk.  We vaccinate on a delayed schedule.  I cloth diaper.  I usually use baking soda and vinegar to clean things.  Lots of hippie crap.

And today I got my period.  Which I was super excited about every since I saw my friend Danielle’s moldy tampon on her blog, then a wide variety of news agencies picked it up.  After the moldy tampon I decided to go the diva cup route.

Diva cups are little cups that you put up your hoo ha and it catches all your fluid then you pour it out and catch some more until you are all done.

Those things are quite the adventure for the first time user.

It was easy to get it and secured.  So that was good.  And then I had to poo.  And I went and couldn’t feel it anymore and was super sad because I thought it fell into the toilet.  And I was *not* digging to find it.  And even if I did, I could *never* put that in my hoo ha again.

Okay whatever.  But my gut was telling me just wait before you put in a tampon.  I was hoping that my flow would be light enough that I could drag the kids to the hippie market and buy another one this morning.  I had to go to the bathroom again and noticed I was still clean.

That damn cup is now way UP there and I’m terrified I won’t be able to get it out.  And the very last thing I want to do is have to go to the ER to get a diva cup removed.  Seriously.  That is the *last* thing I want to do today.

Life in a semi-cruncy sitcom.  Ugh

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